278. Hospitality and Self-Compassion: Key Ingredients in Her Success Recipe
At age 32, she owned a thriving and critically acclaimed restaurant, fulfilling a dream she’d nurtured since she was 10. But she realized her life was one-dimensional. To find the balance her heart cried out for, she made a bold decision.
Deborah Goldstein founded two companies to help professionals maximize their careers. Goldie’s Table Matters (GTM) enables professionals to maximize networking opportunities and business development. DRIVEN Professionals helps businesses increase employee retention and productivity, using a holistic approach in a three-part development cycle: professional, business and personal. Deborah is DRIVEN’s own best student, constantly learning and sharing life’s best practices, and integrating work and personal life.
How Did You Start Using Your Talents?
At age 10, Deborah had her eye on New York Mets right-fielder Rusty Staub. She wanted to be a ballplayer, but when she heard that there are no girls in baseball, she set her sights on owning a restaurant.
Rusty Staub also owned some restaurants. She started learning about business on the day she got her driver’s license. At age 16, she went to work as a short order cook “in a charming restaurant called Lickity Split, an ice cream parlor that served great food. From the first moment of my first day of training, I knew I had serendipitously found the perfect career for me.” Later she enrolled in Cornell University’s prestigious School of Hotel Administration, ranked number one in the world by the Journal of Hospitality & Tourism Research.
The Most Impactful Turning Point?
The decision to leave the career of her childhood dreams, after successful years as a restaurateur, was monumental. “I realized that I couldn’t have a restaurant and hope for love in my life. In effect, the restaurant was my husband. The only time I could accept a date was on Monday evening, unless somebody called in sick. I was living a very full and incredibly satisfying life—but it was one-dimensional. I wanted to find balance in life. So, I decided at age 32, if I wanted to move on with my life, perhaps the best thing to do would be to just lock the door, and start the life that I wanted to explore. So, I locked the door, and that was my exit strategy.”
The Most Powerful Lessons Learned?
“Realize that if we’re not living to make ourselves happy, if we’re doing things just for the approval of others, then we’re missing out on a lot of life. Develop a growth mindset, as opposed to a fixed mindset. In other words, ask yourself, ‘What can I learn? How can I be better? How can I learn from this?’ Start leaning into the fear instead of running away from challenges. I think that’s a big part of a growth mindset.”
Steps to Success from Deborah Goldstein
1. Stop living for the approval of others and focus on your own happiness.
2. Develop a growth mindset, not a static, fixed mindset.
3. Celebrate your daily successes, large and small.
4. Practice self-compassion and don’t take yourself too seriously.
On Her Bookshelf
Positively Outrageous Service, by T. Scott Gross
Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, by Brené Brown
The 5 Choices: The Path to Extraordinary Productivity by Kory Kogon, Adam Merrill, and Leena Rinne
Connecting With Deborah Goldstein
Subscribe to the Podcast Free: